Girls Day

At least one Saturday a month my husband takes Taki out for "Boys Day". They go the the coffee shop and then to get their hair cut at the neighborhood barber shop "7 bucks a whack". (Yes, that's what it is really called.) There are only two chairs in this tiny barber shop. If you ask my son he will tell you that one is John's and one is the lady's. He doesn't know the lady's name but he knows that he doesn't want her to cut his hair. John always cuts it. The lady cuts dad's and John cuts his. The next stop is often the golf store to try out some new clubs or pick up some practice balls, to be saved for when dad is barbecuing in the back yard. Sometimes they go to lunch or go through the car wash. Taki doesn't really care because it is Boy's Day.



So obviously when it is Boy's Day it is also Girls Day. This is my opportunity to spend some time with just GiGi and try and do something special. "Something special" has a whole new meaning than it did in the past. Before her illness we could go to movies, do each others fingernails, have a special dinner; the objective really was to be without little brother. Now, it' s hard for me to find something for us to do together. There are few things that I see her enjoying: swinging in the backyard, chewing on things, eating, and playing in her room. I struggle with how to translate what Girls Day means now. What does she need to get away from now? What would be a special day for her? I spent a lot of time trying to figure out this conundrum. I went around and around with what to do. I tend to overcomplicate things so instead of constantly seeking, I let it be.

Last weekend her and I ventured to the grocery store. It happened to be Boys Day and I thought we'd try something new. I've taken her before but this was different. I made this about her and not about a list of things I needed to fill my refrigerator. I made it about her and not about my son wanting to stay in the toy section for an hour. She would have free reign of the store and I would follow and cheer her on. Just being their for her, letting her be herself, in her own time and space was awesome. She got to run around. I wasn't tugging at her to keep moving so we could keep on schedule and make the next stop before it was time to move on to the next destination. What I discovered was that she really enjoyed pushing the cart. A few times she walked up and tried to take someone else's cart. Most of the people would say something like: "Oh no that's not your cart." Then I usually apologized and we walked away, but there was this one guy who looked at her and said "Does something in their look good to you?" He was having a conversation with her. He engaged with her. He wasn't quick to get away from her. It was a celebratory moment. I wrote in an earlier blog about the new things to celebrate and this was one of things. Inside I celebrated for her. She was having a blast and I was there to share it with her. I celebrated for us.

Girls Day is back!!!